The Shorter Facebook Catechism - “Courtbook for Guys”

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(these are the kind of things you consider and write when you need a break from a systematic theology paper!)

The Shorter Facebook Catechism (for single guys)

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Q 1: What is the chief end of facebook?
A 1: The chief end of facebook is to find thee a wife.

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Q 2: How art thee to go about finding thyself a wife?
A 2: Thou shalt search thine own network, and that of thine friend’s, to findest a godly girl who is listed as “single”, or hast no relationship listing at all.

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Q 3: What shalt thee do once such a girl hast been found?
A 3: Thou, after deciding such a girl is godly, shalt commenceth to poke her.

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Q 4: What is a poke?
A 4: A poke is a notification of acknowledgment, of thee and thy godly girl. It attempteth to gain the attention of the girl who hast been poked. It also mayest be thought of as a cyber-wink.

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Q 5: How dost thou know when to poke?
A 5: Thou shalt poke at thy convience, with intentions of buying a ring within one year, if it cometh to that.

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Q 6: When shalt thee requesteth to befriendeth a girl?
A 6: Thou shalt requesteth friendship no sooner than 1 poke, and no later than 7.

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Q 7: How many girls canst thee poke?
A 7: Thou shalt ask Josh Harris.

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Q 8: What shalt thou do if thy poke is rejected?
A 8: Thou shalt offer a virtual hug. (Side-hug of course)

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Q 9: How shalt thou interpret a return poke?
A 9: Thou shalt interpret a return poke as an “I do”.

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Q 10: How shalt thee explain to thy children how their parents met?
A 10: Thou shalt answer, “Thy mother wast the first girl to return thy father’s poke.”

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Ahh….courtship in the 21st century!

‘BH

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